I don’t want to write about this film. Take a so-called feel good movie and turn it upside down and you get Tarnation. I will relive this movie for the purposes of this review, but I won’t be watching it again.

First time filmmaker Jonathan Caouette’s personal life story is pure hell. While watching a surprisingly well-edited montage of home movies, answering machine recordings, photographs, and video diaries, his life unfolds as a series of ongoing tragedies.

No father around, a schizophrenic mother, abuse while in foster care, hospitalization from taking tainted drugs, self-mutilation… and that’s just up to his teenage years. He started filming himself at the age of 11 and from there he began recording candid moments and the environment of his childhood and beyond. As he grew up, he found some comfort in underground films that mirrored his feelings and a new acceptance while hanging out at a gay night club.

 

 

Throughout these years, he makes many visits and calls to his mother. Sometimes she talks about her sad experiences growing up, a life no better than her son’s. She’s still as loving of a mother as she can be and she states on camera that her greatest hope is that she can break the cycle of abuse with her son. Her dream is achieved as he is presently living in New York City in a stable relationship with his partner David. Jon’s dream is also made real, as he is able to escape the small town in Texas that holds so many of the horrors of his past and live as an actor and filmmaker in the city. He never lets go of the bond he shares with her and not once does he place any blame on her.

So what in tarnation was he thinking when he decided to show the world this twisted version of a growing up story? The images are real and disturbing, taking you out of your comfort zone, but it’s a small price to pay compared to what he went through. The final result is a human survival displayed in a multitude of bright and dark colors, mood music, and switching back and forth from steady clips to jumbles of images from his recordings. You simply can’t look away.

Tags: documentary, Emma Lord, independent film, Jonathan Caouette, sundance film festival, Tarnation

This entry was posted on Monday, January 12th, 2009 at 4:37 pm and is filed under Reviews. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.