{"id":17957,"date":"2025-02-27T09:40:33","date_gmt":"2025-02-27T14:40:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.eckerd.edu\/news\/?p=17957"},"modified":"2025-03-04T12:00:42","modified_gmt":"2025-03-04T17:00:42","slug":"advocacy-services-healthy-relationships","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.eckerd.edu\/news\/blog\/advocacy-services-healthy-relationships\/","title":{"rendered":"Advocacy Services staff member discusses healthy relationships, pop culture representation with students"},"content":{"rendered":"[vc_row type=&#8221;in_container&#8221; full_screen_row_position=&#8221;middle&#8221; column_margin=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_tablet=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_phone=&#8221;default&#8221; scene_position=&#8221;center&#8221; text_color=&#8221;dark&#8221; text_align=&#8221;left&#8221; row_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; row_border_radius_applies=&#8221;bg&#8221; overflow=&#8221;visible&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; shape_divider_position=&#8221;bottom&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221;][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;no-extraa-padding&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;all&#8221; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; phone_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; background_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; background_hover_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; column_backdrop_filter=&#8221;none&#8221; column_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; column_link_target=&#8221;_self&#8221; column_position=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; width=&#8221;1\/1&#8243; tablet_width_inherit=&#8221;default&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;default&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; border_type=&#8221;simple&#8221; column_border_width=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]\n<audio class=\"wp-audio-shortcode\" id=\"audio-17957-1\" preload=\"none\" style=\"width: 100%;\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"audio\/mpeg\" src=\"https:\/\/anchor.fm\/s\/deee7c24\/podcast\/play\/99361263\/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2025-2-4%2F605c1397-a85e-da42-1fd4-c44ce1e97ed6.mp3?_=1\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/anchor.fm\/s\/deee7c24\/podcast\/play\/99361263\/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2025-2-4%2F605c1397-a85e-da42-1fd4-c44ce1e97ed6.mp3\">https:\/\/anchor.fm\/s\/deee7c24\/podcast\/play\/99361263\/https%3A%2F%2Fd3ctxlq1ktw2nl.cloudfront.net%2Fstaging%2F2025-2-4%2F605c1397-a85e-da42-1fd4-c44ce1e97ed6.mp3<\/a><\/audio>\n[\/vc_column_text][divider line_type=&#8221;No Line&#8221; custom_height=&#8221;16&#8243;][image_with_animation image_url=&#8221;17959&#8243; image_size=&#8221;full&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;entrance&#8221; animation=&#8221;None&#8221; animation_movement_type=&#8221;transform_y&#8221; hover_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; alignment=&#8221;&#8221; img_link_large=&#8221;yes&#8221; border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; box_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; image_loading=&#8221;default&#8221; max_width=&#8221;100%&#8221; max_width_mobile=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]<em>Victim Advocate Ashly Delaney (at podium) provides support and offers confidential conversations to students regarding relationships. Photos by Madison DeVore &#8217;25<\/em>[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row type=&#8221;full_width_content&#8221; full_screen_row_position=&#8221;middle&#8221; column_margin=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_tablet=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_phone=&#8221;default&#8221; scene_position=&#8221;center&#8221; top_padding=&#8221;32&#8243; text_color=&#8221;dark&#8221; text_align=&#8221;left&#8221; row_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; row_border_radius_applies=&#8221;bg&#8221; overflow=&#8221;visible&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; shape_divider_position=&#8221;bottom&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; shape_type=&#8221;&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;padding-2-percent&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;right&#8221; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; phone_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; background_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; background_hover_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; column_backdrop_filter=&#8221;none&#8221; column_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; column_link_target=&#8221;_self&#8221; column_position=&#8221;default&#8221; el_class=&#8221;news_subhead&#8221; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; width=&#8221;1\/1&#8243; tablet_width_inherit=&#8221;default&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;default&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; border_type=&#8221;simple&#8221; column_border_width=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221; column_padding_type=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]Empathetic. Activist. Open-minded.<br \/>\n[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row type=&#8221;full_width_content&#8221; full_screen_row_position=&#8221;middle&#8221; column_margin=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_tablet=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_phone=&#8221;default&#8221; scene_position=&#8221;center&#8221; top_padding=&#8221;32&#8243; text_color=&#8221;dark&#8221; text_align=&#8221;left&#8221; row_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; row_border_radius_applies=&#8221;bg&#8221; overflow=&#8221;visible&#8221; advanced_gradient_angle=&#8221;0&#8243; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; shape_divider_position=&#8221;bottom&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; shape_type=&#8221;&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;padding-2-percent&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;right&#8221; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; phone_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; background_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; background_hover_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; column_backdrop_filter=&#8221;none&#8221; column_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; column_link_target=&#8221;_self&#8221; column_position=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; width=&#8221;2\/3&#8243; tablet_width_inherit=&#8221;default&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;default&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; border_type=&#8221;simple&#8221; column_border_width=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221; column_padding_type=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]These are three words Ashly Delaney, victim advocate in Eckerd College\u2019s <a href=\"https:\/\/www.eckerd.edu\/advocacy\/\">Advocacy Services<\/a>, uses to describe herself.<\/p>\n<p>With over 15 years in the field and degrees in psychology and criminology, Delaney now serves the Eckerd community by providing support, discussing options with those facing an unhealthy relationship or domestic violence, and simply having confidential conversations with any students who want to stop by during her open office hours.<\/p>\n<p>Delaney led #RelationshipGoals: Intro to Healthy Relationships on Feb. 13, a campus event where students gathered to discuss common indicators of healthy and unhealthy relationships\u2014whether romantic or platonic\u2014even looking through the lens of relationship portrayal in pop culture.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cShow of hands: How many of you at some point in your lives had a sit-down discussion with somebody about sex?\u201d Delaney asked. Most students raised their hands.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cNow how many of you have had a sit-down conversation with somebody in your lives about how to have a healthy relationship?\u201d Fewer hands raised.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;no-extra-padding&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;all&#8221; top_margin_tablet=&#8221;32&#8243; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; phone_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; background_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; background_hover_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; column_backdrop_filter=&#8221;none&#8221; column_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; column_link_target=&#8221;_self&#8221; column_position=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; width=&#8221;1\/3&#8243; tablet_width_inherit=&#8221;default&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;default&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; border_type=&#8221;simple&#8221; column_border_width=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221; column_padding_type=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][image_with_animation image_url=&#8221;17958&#8243; image_size=&#8221;full&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;entrance&#8221; animation=&#8221;None&#8221; animation_movement_type=&#8221;transform_y&#8221; hover_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; alignment=&#8221;&#8221; img_link_large=&#8221;yes&#8221; border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; box_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; image_loading=&#8221;default&#8221; max_width=&#8221;100%&#8221; max_width_mobile=&#8221;default&#8221;][divider line_type=&#8221;No Line&#8221; custom_height=&#8221;16&#8243;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]<em>Ashly Delaney<\/em>[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row type=&#8221;full_width_content&#8221; full_screen_row_position=&#8221;middle&#8221; column_margin=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_tablet=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_phone=&#8221;default&#8221; scene_position=&#8221;center&#8221; top_padding=&#8221;32&#8243; text_color=&#8221;dark&#8221; text_align=&#8221;left&#8221; row_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; row_border_radius_applies=&#8221;bg&#8221; overflow=&#8221;visible&#8221; advanced_gradient_angle=&#8221;0&#8243; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; shape_divider_position=&#8221;bottom&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; shape_type=&#8221;&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;no-extra-padding&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;right&#8221; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; phone_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; background_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; background_hover_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; column_backdrop_filter=&#8221;none&#8221; column_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; column_link_target=&#8221;_self&#8221; column_position=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; width=&#8221;1\/1&#8243; tablet_width_inherit=&#8221;default&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;default&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; border_type=&#8221;simple&#8221; column_border_width=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221; column_padding_type=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]Delaney stressed the importance of students giving themselves time to figure out what they want and don\u2019t want in their own relationships.<\/p>\n<p>When asked why it\u2019s especially important for college students\u2014who may be living independently for the first time\u2014to learn about healthy relationships and what they want, Delaney said, \u201cI think that a lot of the experiences that you have in college really shape how you see the world and shape the relationships you go on to have after college.<\/p>\n[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row type=&#8221;full_width_content&#8221; full_screen_row_position=&#8221;middle&#8221; column_margin=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_tablet=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_phone=&#8221;default&#8221; scene_position=&#8221;center&#8221; top_padding=&#8221;32&#8243; text_color=&#8221;dark&#8221; text_align=&#8221;left&#8221; row_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; row_border_radius_applies=&#8221;bg&#8221; overflow=&#8221;visible&#8221; advanced_gradient_angle=&#8221;0&#8243; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; shape_divider_position=&#8221;bottom&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; shape_type=&#8221;&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;padding-2-percent&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;all&#8221; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; phone_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; background_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; background_hover_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; column_backdrop_filter=&#8221;none&#8221; column_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; column_link_target=&#8221;_self&#8221; column_position=&#8221;default&#8221; el_class=&#8221;lg_text&#8221; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; width=&#8221;1\/1&#8243; tablet_width_inherit=&#8221;default&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;default&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; border_type=&#8221;simple&#8221; column_border_width=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221; column_padding_type=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]<span class=\"accent-color\">\u201cThe more people get comfortable with identifying things that are healthy and unhealthy and constantly doing that reflection,\u201d she added, \u201cthe more likely they\u2019re going to be able to continue doing that reflection in five years and 10 years\u201d\u2014in romantic relationships and friendships.<\/span>[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row][vc_row type=&#8221;full_width_content&#8221; full_screen_row_position=&#8221;middle&#8221; column_margin=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_tablet=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_phone=&#8221;default&#8221; scene_position=&#8221;center&#8221; top_padding=&#8221;32&#8243; text_color=&#8221;dark&#8221; text_align=&#8221;left&#8221; row_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; row_border_radius_applies=&#8221;bg&#8221; overflow=&#8221;visible&#8221; advanced_gradient_angle=&#8221;0&#8243; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; shape_divider_position=&#8221;bottom&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; shape_type=&#8221;&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;no-extra-padding&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;right&#8221; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; phone_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; background_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; background_hover_color_opacity=&#8221;1&#8243; column_backdrop_filter=&#8221;none&#8221; column_shadow=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; column_link_target=&#8221;_self&#8221; column_position=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; width=&#8221;1\/1&#8243; tablet_width_inherit=&#8221;default&#8221; animation_type=&#8221;default&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221; border_type=&#8221;simple&#8221; column_border_width=&#8221;none&#8221; column_border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221; column_padding_type=&#8221;default&#8221; gradient_type=&#8221;default&#8221;][vc_column_text css=&#8221;&#8221; text_direction=&#8221;default&#8221;]Delaney fostered a discussion-based event, instead of delivering one-way information. She asked students what they think are key indicators of healthy and unhealthy relationships, before sharing the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.joinonelove.org\/signs-healthy-relationship\/\">\u201cBig 10\u201d indicators from One Love Foundation<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Loyalty, respect and honesty were traits students pitched as necessary for healthy relationships, while they mentioned manipulation, overdependence and pressure to isolate from other loved ones as ingredients for unhealthy relationships.<\/p>\n<p>Encouraging further thought on what makes a relationship healthy or not, Delaney brought pop culture examples to the table.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWe were on a break!\u201d students chimed as a photo of Ross and Rachel from <em>Friends<\/em> was displayed. Chatter and laughter filled the room.<\/p>\n<p>Additionally, David and Patrick of <em>Schitt\u2019s Creek<\/em> and Noah and Allie from <em>The Notebook<\/em> were up for dissection. Students were prompted to bring up other relationship representations in media, raising a magnifying glass to the dynamics of Meredith and Derek from <em>Grey\u2019s Anatomy<\/em> and even Lila and Dexter from <em>Dexter<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>While the <em>Dexter <\/em>case was pretty clearly unhealthy, other relationships required deeper consideration. Delaney discussed David and Patrick and the instance where one character was ready to say \u201cI love you\u201d without pressuring the other to say it back. Intensity and love bombing, Delaney noted, are an unhealthy trait, so not rushing a partner into something is key to healthy relationships.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhy should we avoid saying someone\u2019s relationship is perfect?\u201d Delaney asked.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou don\u2019t know, like, every single detail of the relationship,\u201d one student answered, while another said, \u201cIt\u2019s just not possible.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>We see relationships in snapshots, Delaney explained, rather than the full picture. If somebody\u2019s family and friends are always saying their relationship seems perfect, it may make it difficult for them to speak up, admitting it isn\u2019t, or seeking help if they are facing abuse.<\/p>\n<p>We also shouldn\u2019t be asking, \u201cWhy doesn\u2019t this person just leave if things are so bad?\u201d There are a multitude of reasons we can\u2019t see, Delaney pointed out. Whether it\u2019s that a person has been in a relationship long term and feels comfortable, they don\u2019t have a safe plan to leave without fear of abuse, or they just love their partner.<\/p>\n<p>A student raised the idea of finances, marriage and having children together as a barrier to leaving, while another student said someone may focus on the good parts of a relationship and try to ignore the bad.<\/p>\n<p>Students who would like to speak confidentially with Delaney about safety planning or relationships\u2014or who simply want to meet her\u2014were encouraged to visit her office at Brown Hall 123 or contact her via <a href=\"mailto:delaneyae@eckerd.edu\">email<\/a>.[\/vc_column_text][\/vc_column][\/vc_row]\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>[vc_row type=&#8221;in_container&#8221; full_screen_row_position=&#8221;middle&#8221; column_margin=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_tablet=&#8221;default&#8221; column_direction_phone=&#8221;default&#8221; scene_position=&#8221;center&#8221; text_color=&#8221;dark&#8221; text_align=&#8221;left&#8221; row_border_radius=&#8221;none&#8221; row_border_radius_applies=&#8221;bg&#8221; overflow=&#8221;visible&#8221; overlay_strength=&#8221;0.3&#8243; gradient_direction=&#8221;left_to_right&#8221; shape_divider_position=&#8221;bottom&#8221; bg_image_animation=&#8221;none&#8221;][vc_column column_padding=&#8221;no-extraa-padding&#8221; column_padding_tablet=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_phone=&#8221;inherit&#8221; column_padding_position=&#8221;all&#8221; column_element_direction_desktop=&#8221;default&#8221; column_element_spacing=&#8221;default&#8221; desktop_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221; tablet_text_alignment=&#8221;default&#8221;&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":154,"featured_media":17959,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[161,159],"tags":[1352,1355,1353,1354],"class_list":{"0":"post-17957","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-student-life","8":"category-students","9":"tag-advocacy","10":"tag-ashly-delaney","11":"tag-relationships","12":"tag-wellbeing"},"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.6 (Yoast SEO v27.6) - 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